Chapter 10: An Apology That Came Too Late

Cole avoided me for the rest of the day.

That should have made me relieved.

Instead, I kept thinking about the expression on his face when I told him he didn't get to touch people because he was angry.

For years, I had forgiven Cole before he even apologized.

If he forgot something important, I made excuses for him.

If he snapped at me, I told myself he was stressed.

If he ignored me because Amber was around, I convinced myself I was imagining things.

But I wasn't doing that anymore.

***

That evening, there was a knock on our apartment door.

I was sitting at the dining table working on my college applications.

My mom looked toward the entrance.

"Are you expecting someone?"

I shook my head.

A moment later, my father's voice came from the hallway.

"Aurora, Cole is here."

My hand stopped.

My mother immediately frowned.

"Didn't we make it clear he isn't welcome here?"

"He said he wants to apologize," my father replied.

I closed my laptop.

"I'll talk to him."

"Rory, you don't have to," my mom said softly.

"I know."

That was exactly why I wanted to.

Because this time, the decision would be mine.

***

Cole was standing outside our apartment door.

He looked different.

Not physically.

Just... smaller somehow.

The boy who had always seemed so confident was staring at the floor.

When he heard the door open, he immediately looked up.

"Aurora."

I stayed inside the doorway.

"You have five minutes."

He swallowed.

"I came to apologize."

I waited.

Cole took a breath.

"I'm sorry for slapping you."

His voice was low.

"There is no excuse for it."

For a moment, neither of us spoke.

Then I nodded.

"Okay."

His eyes widened slightly.

I could practically see the relief begin forming on his face.

So I continued.

"I accept that you regret it."

The relief disappeared.

"But that doesn't mean everything goes back to normal."

Cole stared at me.

"Aurora, we've known each other our whole lives."

"I know."

"One mistake shouldn't erase everything."

I looked at him quietly.

"One mistake?"

His lips parted.

I stepped outside and pulled the door shut behind me.

"You think this is about one slap, Cole?"

His expression shifted.

"Then what else is it about?"

I laughed once.

There wasn't any humor in it.

"It's about every single time Amber insulted me and you told me to lighten up."

"It's about every time you treated me like I was childish because I liked things you didn't understand."

"It's about watching you defend her while asking me to be more patient."

"And it's about the fact that when I finally stopped taking it, you called me dramatic."

Cole went silent.

I could see him searching for an argument.

But there wasn't one.

"I didn't realize..." he finally whispered.

"Exactly."

My voice softened.

"You didn't realize because you never had to."

"I was always there."

"No matter what you said, I forgave you."

"No matter who you chose, I waited."

"You got comfortable with the idea that I would never leave."

Cole's eyes turned red.

"Aurora..."

"But I did leave."

That was the truth.

I hadn't moved away.

I still lived across the hall.

We still went to the same school.

But emotionally?

I had gone somewhere Cole could no longer reach.

***

Cole suddenly looked terrified.

"Is this because of Ethan?"

I blinked.

"What?"

"You're spending time with him now."

"So?"

"You barely knew him two weeks ago."

"And I've known you for seventeen years," I replied.

"What's your point?"

Cole's face went pale.

For once, he had no answer.

I shook my head.

"Ethan has nothing to do with this."

"I didn't walk away from you because I found someone else."

"I walked away because I finally realized I deserved better than someone who only valued me when he thought I belonged to him."

Cole stared at me.

His shoulders slowly dropped.

That sentence had hit him.

Hard.

"I never thought you belonged to me," he said weakly.

I looked directly into his eyes.

"Then why are you so angry that I don't belong to you anymore?"

Silence.

A long, painful silence.

Cole looked away first.

And in that moment, I knew.

He finally understood his feelings.

Unfortunately for him, I had already spent nine years understanding mine.

And I was tired.

***

Cole left without saying goodbye.

I watched him walk back toward his apartment.

For the first time in my life, I didn't feel the urge to run after him.

I went back inside.

My mom was waiting in the kitchen.

"You okay?"

I thought about it.

Then I smiled.

"Actually... yeah."

And I meant it.

The next morning, I arrived at school to find Amber standing beside my locker.

She looked furious.

The moment she saw me, she crossed her arms.

"We need to talk about Cole."

I stared at her.

Then I slowly shut my locker.

"No," I said.

"We really don't."

Amber's expression darkened.

"You think you're so special now, don't you?"

I picked up my bag.

For the first time, her words didn't hurt.

"No, Amber."

I walked past her.

"I just finally know I'm enough."

Behind me, she called my name.

I didn't turn around.

Some conversations no longer deserved an answer.

And some doors, once closed, were meant to stay that way.