Chapter 2: The Love That Was Never Mine

In the end, my parents decided to take my sister out to dinner.

Before they left, Isabela asked, “Sis, want to come with us?”

Before I could answer, my brother cut in.

“She never eats with us. You know that.”

He glared at me.

“Some sister. Can’t even be bothered to spend time with her own family. It’s embarrassing.”

My face flushed, a strange mix of hot and cold.

Standing there was unbearable.

A fresh wave of injustice washed over me.

My sister loved seafood.

So every family dinner out was at a seafood restaurant.

I was allergic to shellfish.

I’d get there and be able to eat nothing but bread.

My parents didn’t see that as a problem.

Instead, they said I was being difficult.

They accused me of ruining Isabela’s appetite.

After that happened enough times, I just stopped going.

I’d learned to step back, but they never saw it as an act of consideration.

To them, it was just more proof of how cold I was.

My sister stuck her tongue out at me and dropped the act.

Then she followed my parents out the door.

I walked into the kitchen and reheated last night’s leftovers.

I ate alone at the dining table, then put my plate in the dishwasher.

I’d just closed the door when my phone buzzed.

A video call from Mom.

Turns out, they’d gone shopping for my sister after dinner.

Mom held up her phone, pointing the camera at a rack of T-shirts.

“Which color do you like? Pick one.”

I hesitated between the blue and the white.

“Then we’ll get both,” Mom said.

After the call ended, I started to cry.

This time, they were tears of happiness.

Two T-shirts were nothing compared to my sister's designer wardrobe.

But for a second, I let myself believe there was a small corner of my mother's heart reserved for me.

For a fleeting moment, I even thought about it.

I wanted to change my college decision back, to stay in California after all.

Not long after, they came home.

Sure enough, my mom, dad, and brother’s arms were laden with shopping bags.

All of them filled with the latest designer clothes for my sister.

I hurried over, reaching for the bag I thought held my T-shirts.

Just then, I heard my sister laugh.

“Today was such a steal. We got all this for only twelve thousand dollars.”

“And Nordstrom threw in two T-shirts for free.”

My hand froze in midair.

So it wasn’t a sudden moment of caring.

They were just freebies they’d gotten while shopping for my sister.

The flicker of warmth in my chest was instantly extinguished.

“You can give the T-shirts to someone else. I don’t want them.”

I dropped the bag and ran back to my room.

The second the door shut, the tears fell.

My parents’ and brother’s displeased voices followed me from the hallway.

“Isabela offers her new clothes and this is the attitude she gets?”

“Where does she get that temper?”

My brother chimed in.

“Exactly. She’s not nearly as sweet as Isabela.”

“No wonder everyone likes Isabela better.”

Then he asked my parents directly.

“Are you sure you guys had twins?”

“This family would be better off with just one daughter.”

You’ll get your wish soon, I thought.

Soon, you won’t have a sister you can’t stand.

Mom and Dad won’t have an unlikable daughter.

I wouldn't have to waste any more energy hoping.

That love was never going to be mine.